So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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