we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
