It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
