you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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