i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
