We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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