Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Randomize
