Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses youâ€
Randomize
