you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
