i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Randomize
