he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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