I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize