Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
