he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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