she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Randomize
