He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
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