everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
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