the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
