I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
