You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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