Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
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