it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
