North Korea, Best Korea!
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
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