I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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