I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize