Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
