would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize
