just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
