I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
