what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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