It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
This is my gift to your gina
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Randomize
