know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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