I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
