make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
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