Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
