Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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