You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
