I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
