winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
