S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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