he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
