I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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