is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
