Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
