fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
i think my cat just said my name.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
