haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
