I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize
