Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
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