who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize