its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
