He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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