Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
